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1) The one who seduced you and fucked you over and broke your heart in a million pieces and laughed about it. Animorphs. Animorphs, Animorphs, Animorphs. The books were so freaking awesome, I loved the storyline even with the incessant onomatopoeia, and then somewhere in the thirties or forties it suddenly pulled onto Interstate WHUT and sped along to WTF Lane. …okay, granted, it did make occasional detours along I-WHUT (see: the Ellimist), but it was going so freaking well and then Crayak got involved and it all went to hell.
2) The old flame you don't see very often any more but whom you still really enjoy getting together with for a few drinks and maybe a pleasant nostalgic romp in the sheets.
Diadem. Got into it about the same time as Animorphs, got six books that ended on a cliffhanger, and then suddenly BAM — no more. Fast-forward about six years, and WTF more books are being published. Harry Potter fans, I do not want to fucking HEAR it.
3) The mysterious dark gothy one whom you used to sit up with talking until 3 a.m. at weird coffeehouses and with whom you were quite smitten until you realized he really was fucking crazy.
Mercedes Lackey. Granted, I only ever read Bedlam’s Bard, which is fun but kinda dark, then I found out there were sequels and she broke up the OT3 and NO.
4) The one you spent a whole weekend in bed with and who drank up all your liquor, and whom you'd still really like to fuck again although you're relieved he doesn't actually live in town.
Anne McCaffrey. Every now and then I go through these stages where I absolutely have to read every Pern book I get my hands on, and then we get those lovely little rants about T’ron and T’ton and what happened to Fax’s children and I’m going over there now.
5) The steady.
I’ve got a few of these — mainly the Matrix, who I will never let go of even if I get amazingly quiet. Also the Dresden Files, Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon, and Avatar: The Last Airbender.
6) The alluring stranger whom you've flirted with at parties but have never gotten really serious with.
Yeah, that’d have to be Transformers. Made it most of the way through Armada and got distracted by something shiny. Started G-1, got distracted by something shiny. Loved the recent movie, though.
7) The one you hang out with and have vague fantasies about maybe having a thing with but ultimately you're just good buddies 'cause the friendship is there but the chemistry ain't.
Star Wars EU and FMA.
8) The one your friends keep introducing you to and who seems like a hell of a cool guy except it's never really gone anywhere.
Excel Saga. I dunno, guys. I just can’t.
9) The one who's slept with all your friends, and you keep looking at him and thinking, "Him? How the hell did he land all these cool babes?"
Death Note. Seriously, what the fuck?
10) The one your friend has fallen for like a ton of bricks and whom she keeps babbling to you about on the phone for hours, and you'd be happy for her except you just know it's going to end badly.
Anyone who gets into Evangelion ever.
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sick