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An excuse to rattle on about books! Huzzah! [Thursday July 2nd, 2009 at 7:55pm ] [ music | Putting the Damage On--Tori Amos ] 2009 Book Meme: These questions apply to only books read in the first half of 2009. I've read a lot of books in 2009. Fortunately, I keep records. However, I'm not going to post that list unless somebody really really needs it for some reason. ( It occured to me after I posted this that I should probably cut it. Because it is CRAZY LONG. ) But it wasn't my fault! ||

been reading romance novels [Tuesday June 30th, 2009 at 5:57pm ] Why is it that every hero and heroine fall in love in a matter of days or (in the most egregious cases) hours? Is that really how it works? I mean, it seems really fast and kind of stupid. I can count on my hands the number of times I've seen people take longer, and those books/movies are usually among my favorites (Devil in Winter, Savage Damsel and the Dwarf, Penelope). And Shards of Honor doesn't count, because... I say so, I guess. ZARTRAM WILLS IT. Props to Anne Stuart for having a hero who realizes that no means no, incidentally. He was getting pretty hot and heavy with his heroine and ( cut for sex ) when she said "no." Most heroes that I can think of would've just kept right on going, but this guy stops. *pets him lots* I think that's when I was convinced he was good for this particular heroine. And how sad is it that I feel like this is something that should be praised? Argh. Okay. Not getting into the rape discussion from a while ago. No, actually, Shards of Honor doesn't count because we get to see a continuing love story for the people in question. It's not marriage and that's it, I'm not left wondering how these two are going to work out the rest of their lives. I get to see it. I get to see them manage and navigate intimacy and kids and in-laws and civil wars and all those other pesky problems you get with marriage, and they do quite a nice job, thank you very much. And that's not just me shipping it like FedEx. Incidentally, when Frederick met Katherine she was engaged, and it wasn't to him either. I must figure out how this works. I suspect it's going to make me strongly dislike Katherine's poor mother, but what can you do. But it wasn't my fault! ||

And a wibble [Tuesday June 30th, 2009 at 12:02am ] WAAAAAAAAAAH But it wasn't my fault! ||

Stuff [Monday June 29th, 2009 at 11:18pm ] 1) Goddamn did I forget a lot about I, Jedi. It's a much better book than I remember it being, and Michael Stackpole is a much better writer than he's generally proven himself to be. Also, BAHAHAHAHAHAHA oh, Exar Kun. So Corran, Our Hero, spends the first half of the book being awesome, and then Exar Kun takes him mentally and physically apart in two pages. We're talking broken bones, curled up in fetal position, the works, so he's a genuinely scary villain for a bit. And then Mara Jade just walks in and verbally bitchslaps Exar Kun back to the Stone Age in about three sentences. "Who dares?" "Who cares, is more like it." Oh Mara. I less than three you so much. I also less than three Mirax and Booster. Corran needs to just smile and nod and do what his lovely wife and father-in-law tell him to. Also, in referance to Isard's Revenge, he needs to stop faking with the dead. Mirax is not amused. 'Twas rather cute that he has a picture of her taped up in his X-wing, though. AND LULZ WHISTLER IS MADE OF WIN. 2) KT IS BACK huzzah! I must send her something. Gluten-free easy-peasy peanut-butter cookies, perhaps (remember those, Sarah?) 3) As far as easy-peasy gluten-free cooking goes, I have also learnt to make egg-drop soup. It is yummy and delicious and requires only three ingredients (four if you want to get fancy and two if you're super lazy, which I am). Though the receipe I followed probably needs more egg. 4) This one only Sarah and Eleanor will get, but... remember how I said I needed to work out Olivia's family a little more...? Yeah, so now she has nine siblings who survived past infancy, two of whom died young anyway and only one of whom is a girl. And now I get to work out Earth-related talents for all of them. HALP. Also, her little sister (the one who shocked the hell out of both parents and all their surviving children) should probably not be named Mary. Suggestions for a Regency-appropriate name that either has a Latinate ring to it or some religious connotations? Those last, because said baby was definitely not an expected one, since it had been nine years since her mother's last successful pregnancy and five years since her last pregnancy, and said mother was forty-eight at the time. I have explanations for why the baby is healthy and alive at such a late (comparatively) maternal age, but they boil down to A Wizard Did It so we'll skip those for now. Sarah and Eleanor (who will be the only ones to get this as well), it has to do with Anne marrying Peter and living in close proximity with Katherine for a while. Her gift being what it is, and Katherine and Frederick being who they are... Oh, and Frederick is now Frederick Aubrey, Earl of Brightwood. Sounds reasonably elvish-yet-respectable, no? Also-also, this entire thing is Bex's fault originally. I blame her. With cookies and ponies. And possibly Australia. 5) Relatedly, I am now writing How Frederick And Katherine Met And Fell In Love And Had Lots Of Sex And Babies (Really Lots of Babies Seriously O Reader You Have No Idea). Puuuuuuck wilt thou beta if I ask really nicely? It's basically a Regency romance IN SPACE WITH MAGIC. 6) I wonder if anyone on my flist is geeky enough to get how Olivia's brothers' names are connected. They are, in age order, Peter Charles, Henry, James, Frank, George, William, and Edward. And yes, Peter's middle name being Charles is important, because Charles actually the name that completes the set, not Peter. I just couldn't bear to rename him, and thought that with Henry's fiancee being named Charlotte that it wasn't a terribly good idea. 7) I GOT MY PONY CARVING OMG. Okay, so last Esco Faire, I purchased a circular wooden carving, about a foot in diameter, of the triple horses of Epona, which is three horses and a lot of Celtic knotwork. It's the symbol in the center here. Anyway. It was ridiculously expensive, and Katie, the wench, was supposed to talk me out of it, but I genuinely couldn't put it down and to make a long story short I stuck it on layaway and finally paid off the full expense a week or so ago. Today, in the mail, I got the carving! I was expecting to have to wait until Esco to pick it up. YAY YAY YAY YAY IT IS SO PRETTY AND SOOTHING TO STROKE. And make no Gollum jokes. I like following the knotwork with my finger. It's a meditational act. And, okay, maybe a little bit of Gollum in it BUT ONLY A LITTLE. my preciousssssssss But it wasn't my fault! || 3 Burning Buildings

[Friday June 26th, 2009 at 5:31pm ] "Booster versus Thrawn. Now there's a match I'd pay money to see." You and me both, Corran. You and me both. ETA: Soooo.... Fey'lya is fucking up Aysr and Gavin's relationship... because he can? idk, I can't find any other reason for him to be doing this. ETA Strikes Back: That's right, Isard. Booster is cooler than you. But we always knew this. Also, Isard is just bitter than Thrawn was also cooler than her. Hence the backchat. Also, she was totally hiding during the Thrawn campaign because she knew he'd end her sorry ass. Because Thrawn? Cooler than Isard. But it wasn't my fault! || 1 Burning Building

some things [Thursday June 25th, 2009 at 4:35pm ] 1) AHA AHA AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA oh honey no. If you're taking Catullus as an accurate reading of morality in general, you are Doing It Wrong. This is the guy who once wrote a poem about the advisability of selling little boys in the marketplace for sex. Also, way to miss Sappho entirely. Also, apparently, Plato. 2) I wish I was kidding about the selling little boys in the marketplace for sex thing. I'm not. 3) Something kind of cool that I noticed: Timothy Zahn tends to name Thrawn's ships less... er... aggressively than the rest of the Empire. I mean, you've got the Iron Fist, the Executor, the Virulence, and then Thrawn has the Chimaera, the Relentless, the Bellicose. Not, admittedly, the nicest names in the universe (except for Chimaera but Zahn's doing something different there), but they're still not as nasty as what the Empire at large has. This is probably because we like Thrawn. Go on, admit it. You like Thrawn. It's okay. He's kind of awesome. Also, apart from the implications of the name Chimaera in general, I'm pretty sure it's got the nicest name because it's Pellaeon's ship. And we love Pellaeon. If you don't like Pellaeon, you're not my friend anymore. 4) I seem to be very interested in pregnant women lately, specifically depictions thereof in literature/fiction. Not sure why; I'm not writing anything where anyone's getting pregnant (of my ladies with children, Heidi, Aikyla and Kira have already finished being pregnant, Lynne, Jen and Murphy aren't having theirs for some time and Cassandra's children aren't hers by blood). Zahn does it right, anyway; I've seen waaaaay too many people who do it wrong. Though even Zahn makes it easier on the woman in question than it really has any right being, particularly if there's more than one baby in there... though I suppose in fairness she is only four or five months along at this point, so while she'd be quite definitely pregnant, she wouldn't be ballooning yet. Though she should be much more exhausted than she is. People always underestimate how freaking tiring growing a baby is. Anyway. Any recommendations to feed this new interest of mine? 5) Oh, Fox News. You... ...nah, you know what, let's just leave it at "Oh, Fox News." 6) Pellaeon has a mustache in most of his depictions. More proof that he's Thrawn's Watson! ...as if we needed more. 7) Somebody used the word "subliminate." In a smut fic. Correctly. My faith in humanity is restored. But it wasn't my fault! || 1 Burning Building

[Tuesday June 23rd, 2009 at 5:37pm ] I feel the need to froth for a bit. Bear with me. Okay, guys. I am so fucking sick and tired of "it's just a show" or "it's just a book" whenever somebody says "it changed my life." Guess what! ART CAN DO THAT. I would argue that the entire point of artistic endeavour is to affect someone, emotionally, mentally, sometimes even physically (porn, for example*). If something doesn't affect you, if it is, in effect, just a book, then it's not art, and I don't think I have ever read a book that didn't make me react in some way. Even if I hated it (Twilight), it still made me react. Everyone who creates is trying to affect somebody out there. One of the greatest compliments I recieved on any piece of writing was "a tremendous gut-punch of a story." It was not a happy story, and I'm sure the feelings evoked were not happy ones, but I was not trying to create happy feelings, and I affected my audience, which is the real and original goal of creativity. I'm sure this is why people beg for reviews so shamelessly, why authors and musicians and artists love to hear from people who've read/heard/seen their stuff, and I know it's why I don't like to write fic for certain people because I know they don't respond. Artists have to know they're creating an effect, any effect. Attention-whoring? Perhaps, but I don't think so. Without response, how do you know you're not screaming into the void? How do you know that there's any point and purpose to what you're doing at all? In short, don't ever dismiss something as "just" a show or book or movie or whatever. Somebody, somewhere, has been affected powerfully by that show or book or movie. I guarantee it. Your dismissal trivializes their feelings and, if it gets back to the artist, makes them feel trivial. Because the worst thing you can ever say to an artist regarding their work or to a person who loves that work is "meh." *If anyone leaves comments arguing about the artistic value of porn, I will hunt you down and murder you in your sleep for spectacularly missing the point. But it wasn't my fault! || 3 Burning Buildings

[Saturday June 20th, 2009 at 6:10pm ] I forgive sf_drama for all crimes past and present, imagined and real. I forgive Twilight for existing. I forgive Joss Whedon for being a heartless son of a bitch and killing Wash LA LA LA THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN making Oz leave Buffy. The reason I forgive them all? Because some marvelous genius cut together some clips from Buffy and Twilight and made "Buffy vs. Edward." I may have cried laughing. But it wasn't my fault! || 1 Burning Building

[Friday June 19th, 2009 at 7:44pm ] Dear lady at the park today: Sooooo... because your three-year-old ran in front of me while I was playing on the swings in such a way that there was no physically possible way of avoiding her no matter how high I'd been going, and as a result I hit her and she fell down and we both probably ended up with bruises... it's my fault, for playing on the swings? Yeah. Uh-huh. I note that you were on the other side of the playground, in a position where you couldn't see either me or your daughter, at the time of the incident. Miss Austen does not approve of your shenanigans: me. I really do hope that the kid's okay. She was a sweetheart. I don't think she was more than bruised, though, since she got up and ran for her mother immediately afterwards. Her mother, on the other hand. Sheesh. But it wasn't my fault! || 1 Burning Building

[Thursday June 18th, 2009 at 7:50pm ] I usually stay out of sf_drama, except for reading, loling and stealing macros, which I assume everyone does. I try not to comment, or get worked up. But this comment really just pissed me off. "Prolly gonna get jumped over this, but... Aren't asexuals just people who are rationalizing the fact that they can't get laid?" Dear sir, madam, or confused: PLEASE DIE IN A FIRE. NOW. THANK YOU. no love, someone who actually knows what the hell they're talking about. ETA: Ballpoint penises came up later. The post is redeemed. BRB, loling. But it wasn't my fault! || 2 Burning Buildings

Fic: Hail to the Pirate King [Wednesday June 17th, 2009 at 7:21pm ] At LONG GODDAMN LAST I have written some fic again. So. Here you go. Title: Hail to the Pirate King Summary: Some things are inherently silly. Like sex in a bucket. Fandom: Pirates of the Caribbean Spoilers: All three movies, but mostly At World's End. In case there's someone living under a rock somewhere who's not seen it. Pairing: Will/Elizabeth Rating: PG-13 Warning[s]: Implied sex. Written for Bex as part of that comment fic meme I did a while back. SEE I ACTUALLY WRITE THIS STUFF EVENTUALLY. Unbeta'd, but spellchecked. ( Here thar be silly!smut. ) But it wasn't my fault! || 2 Burning Buildings

note to Puck [Saturday June 13th, 2009 at 3:41am ] Hey, Puck, I need to change the opening of Glass so we don't have a random character who shows up and never appears again. I've got some ideas but I need to talk to you. When's convienent? But it wasn't my fault! || 1 Burning Building

Complaining About Books [Saturday June 13th, 2009 at 1:07am ] Today I am going to complain about books. Whoopee, I hear you cry, with extreme sarcasm. And I say unto ye, bite me. WARNING. In the following rant, there are several links to TV Tropes. Do not click unless you have a copious amount of time to waste and/or are procrastinating. Or at least don't blame me. Thank you. The books I am going to complain about today are both the first books in serieses that I've been assured that I would love. And you know? I'm actually fairly sure I would love these serieses. Both of them. They've got great ideas, fun side characters and interesting plots. Well, okay, one's rather simpler than the other but it's YA, I'll cut it a break. The reason I don't like these books and in fact didn't really finish either? I hate the main characters. The characters (and books) in question are Clary Fray and Jace Wayland of Cassandra Clare's City of Bones, Mortal Instruments series, and Felix Harrowgate of Sarah Monette's Melusine, Doctrine of Labyrinths series. The first one, I actually didn't like all that much outside of my loathing for Clary and Jace; I suspect it was just a little too young for me, though the plot was intriguing and I love love love love Simon. I mean it. Words cannot express my adoration for Simon. The second one is the really frustrating one, because Felix is only one of two POV protagonists and I adore Mildmay. But Felix can just go suck it. I wish to punch him (and Clary, and Jace) in the face, and I don't understand how the author expects me to like these characters. I dislike them for different reasons, I think. Clary I dislike because she's a snotty little fifteen-year-old who refuses to think about her actions, who manages to get everyone falling in love with her (including Simon; why, Simon, why? I could love you so much better!) despite being a snotty little fifteen-year-old, is gorgeous and doesn't know it, and is just all around exasperating. Jace I loathe because he's a pretty clear Expy of Draco Malfoy, or at least who Cassandra Clare thinks he is, and because he and Clary both think he's this awesome hotshot when, newsflash, he's actually really fucking annoying. Both Clary and Jace actually get love from everyone who we're supposed to like, even Isabelle, who is at first portrayed as crazy because she doesn't like Clary, and then by the end of the book gets over herself. Incidentally, I ship Isabelle/Simon, and someone should write it, and OH SIMON WHY CLARY. WHY. SHE'S A BITCH. Ahem. Sorry. Moving on. I really do adore Simon, incidentally. He's kind of what you'd get if you took Billy-the-werewolf and Josh and blended them together and then added a healthy sprinkling of Abram's genre savvy and self-preservation instincts. *schnoogles Simon* I think he's the only reason I finished the book. Well, him and Luke, who is also awesome, but not as awesome as Simon. I'd read a book about Simon, or Luke. WRITE A BOOK ABOUT SIMON AND LUKE, CASSANDRA. I'D BUY THAT. Ahem. Moving on for real now. Okay. Felix. This is the real shame, because Sarah Monette is a great writer and, as I've mentioned before, the other POV character is just so damn cool. Mildmay is no-nonsense, rather smug, a good thief, something of a jerk with a heart of gold and a wiseass. I adore him about as much as I adore Simon, and I actually tried to read the book for a while skipping all of Felix's sections and just reading Mildmay's. I kept feeling like I was missing stuff, though, and I eventually had to put it down. Felix I hate for slightly different reasons. He's not a Sue or Stu, as Clary and Jace so evidently are, he's just a drama queen. And wangsty. And broken, with no interest in or attempts towards fixing himself. He throws hissy fits, he spends most of the book getting tortured and/or in heroic BSOD, and he's basically just a whiny little angstbucket who I wanted to pitch against the wall because ALL HE DID WAS ANGST. Granted, he had good reasons to angst. But all he did was angst. I didn't want to read that. I saw no reason to read that. 150 pages of Mildmay being awesome were not awesome enough to counteract 150 pages of Felix crying and whining and angsting. So this book I didn't even finish. Maybe he gets better. Maybe he grows up. I'm not going to stick around and watch, because I can't stand that all he does is angst. Bah. He wasn't even a decent woobie, because he wasn't even remotely cute. Cute would have detracted from his PAIN. HIS PAINFUL ANGSTY PAIN. AAUUUGH WE GET IT. ... Aheh. Wow. Sorry. Evidently I had more Felix-related rage stored up than I realized. Anyway. Any books you wouldn't finish because they hit the wrong buttons? What were those buttons? But it wasn't my fault! || 1 Burning Building

[Tuesday June 9th, 2009 at 10:32pm ] Assuming people a) care and b) don't feel like I'm being a drama queen... 1) Still alive. Not suicidal. Never have been. 2) Still want the world to GTFA. This includes the internet. 3) Still unhappy. Working on that. 4) Will come back when I feel like I can. But it wasn't my fault! || 5 Burning Buildings

[Saturday June 6th, 2009 at 2:36am ] I can't sleep. I feel like I give and give and give and never get anything back. I feel like no one appreciates me like I want to be appreciated. I feel like I'm a placeholder in everyone's lives until something better comes along. I feel like I never mattered to anyone at all. I feel like I spend all my time belittling and downplaying my own emotions because no one wants to hear it. I feel like I'm mediocre at everything, including being a friend. I feel like I don't get what I deserve and then I feel like I don't deserve it. I'm tired of pretending to be happy. I'm tired of pushing myself down. I'm tired of coming last. I'm tired of being replaced. I'm tired of feeling like this all the time. I'm tired of talking about things I don't care about because it's all anyone talks about and talking about them is the only way I can keep friends. I'm tired of being serious, I'm tired of being silly, I'm tired of being smart. I'm tired of being everyone's go-to-girl for drama and no one's go-to-girl for happy. I'm tired of playing mommy to half my friends and listening post to the other half. I'm tired of being depended on and tired of depending on people who don't care. I want to have more than two really reciprocal relationships in my life. I want to stop talking about things I don't care about. I want to stop having holes poked in everything I say. I want to stop pampering and petting people's egos. I want to stop playing mommy to the world. I want to stop giving. I want to get something back. I want to be appreciated. I want to stop crying. I want to disappear. I want everyone else to disappear, because then I'll stop being disappointed. I want to stop needing. I want to stop caring. I want to stop dreaming. I want to stop hurting. I want to stop. I want everything to just stop.

[Friday June 5th, 2009 at 10:27pm ] [ mood | lonely ] [ music | The Portrait--James Cameron ] blaaaaaagh. Dear self. Just because people don't center their lives around you, doesn't mean they don't love you. Grow up and stop being such a demanding bitch. Anyway, at least you made somebody else's life a little more appreciated. Call it karma. no love, yourself But it wasn't my fault! || 2 Burning Buildings

[Sunday May 31st, 2009 at 7:39pm ] Things That Made Me Happy Today Peanut butter and celery, more Lois McMaster Bujold books, Unexpected Richard Schiff, clean laundry, fewer ants, good music. I watched a movie today called Last Chance Harvey that was... well, have you ever watched a movie that you were sure you were like but was actually just incredibly awkward to watch? It was like that. This movie is kind of about last chances at love and second chances at everything, and I mostly rented it because Emma Thompson and Dustin Hoffman are the stars. There was no problem with them. They're a joy to watch, especially together, especially in the awkward falling-in-love phase that is actually really ridiculously cute. They're natural and fun and amusing. But the rest of the movie is just... hard. Both main characters are lonely and alone for the first half the movie, and I don't do real well with that sort of thing, I guess it strikes really close to home. Hoffman's character has a daughter who he's got a fairly strained relationship with, and I think the movie could have done without that extra complication unless they were trying to make the first half hour as painful as possible. Blah. It just is not my kind of movie. Apart for Emma Thompson and Dustin Hoffman. Who are fabulous and made of win. But if I want to see them and not get my heart stomped on in a bad way, there's Stranger than Fiction. Wherein I also ship their characters. *cough* Oh! But there was Unexpected Richard Schiff. I wasn't really paying attention to the beginning of the movie because Hoffman and Thompson weren't on screen together and I was bored, and then I looked over and Dustin Hoffman was getting berated by TOBY. It was joy. *uses Toby icon in honor of Unexpected Richard Schiff* ETA: I should point out that I was briefly rather frustrated with Emma Thompson's character. If you get stood up, and the guy later informs you that he was in the hospital, and has the paperwork to back it up? You should maybe be okay with that. It did provoke the immortal line "I'm not a bloody swimming pool, Harvey!" so I think I've forgiven her. But it wasn't my fault! || 5 Burning Buildings

warning: geekiness ahead [Sunday May 31st, 2009 at 2:32pm ] I had to try this once I realized what I could put for number 12. Rules: 1. It’s harder than it looks! That's not a rule! 2. Copy to your own post, erase my answers, enter yours. 3. Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. 4. They have to be real; nothing made up! 5. If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers. 6. You cannot use any word twice and you can’t use your name for the boy/girl name question. 01. What is your name: Kathleen 02. A four letter word: Kiwi 03. A boy’s name: Keith 04. A girl’s name: Katherine 05. An occupation: Kaiser 06. A color: Kendal green 07. Something you wear: Kaftan 08. A food: Kit-Kat bar 09. Something found in the bathroom: Killer 10. A place: Kashmir 11. A reason for being late: Kids 12. Something you shout: KHAAAAAAAAAAN! 13. A movie title: Kiss Me, Kate 14. Something you drink: Kaf (I'm a huge geek so it counts. IT SO DOES.) 15. A musical group: KISS 16. An animal: Kangaroo 17. A street name: King Street 18. A type of car: Kantaka (the white horse ridden by the Buddha) 19. Title of song: King of New York 20. Something you use in school: Katakana But it wasn't my fault! ||

[Friday May 29th, 2009 at 11:38pm ] Things That Made Me Happy Today Baking bread, hanging out with Sarah, LIE TO ME, BUFFY, finding out there's a new movie with Dustin Hoffman and Emma Thompson in, getting Razor out of Blockbuster's, using the word "smote" in everyday conversation. Ants ants ants ants ants ick ick ick there are ants in the kitchen please smite them all now. On the bright side, now Eleanor is into the wonderful camp that is Highlander. And the kitchen is getting a really good cleaning. But ew ew ew ew ew ants! But it wasn't my fault! ||

OKAY FINE [Thursday May 28th, 2009 at 10:56pm ] First ten people to comment with a prompt on this post get a short ficlet from me. Fandoms I'm willing to try include the Vorkosigan Saga, Doctor Who, Battlestar Galactica, the Dresden Files (FG and WW, just because I quit doesn't mean I don't still love the universe), Tamora Pierce (beware; I haven't read Bloodhound), Codex Alera (up until halfway through Academ's Fury, anyway), the X-files, Firefly, Hot Fuzz, the Mummy, the Sarah Jane Adventures, Pirates of the Caribbean, the Middleman, Star Wars, Mercedes Lackey's Valdemar series, Elemental Mages series, and Five Hundred Kingdoms series, and oh, hell, if I've read it or seen it, I'll probably write it. Except Lie to Me, Avatar, and the West Wing. And Star Trek. But it wasn't my fault! || 7 Burning Buildings

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